Lee Feinswog

[Bossdawg]

I don't care who wrote the article or when, this guy is stupid!!!

For example Old Dominion is ranked 104 because they won the women's sailing event, Whoppdie doo.

UNC Wilmington-144-They have a par thee intramural golf course. ooohhhh! They are bad.

Heere is a shocker Denver #73 bceause they have a good ski team.
Wow, Do I have to explain why they have a good ski team, didn't think so.

Furman_82 This is the best. They are ranked so high because their slogan is "FU all the time" that is great I can see how they are ranked 75 slots higher than tech.

Didn't I tell you this guy was stupid.

[Bossdawg]

P.S. Georgetown 88 because it is Paul Tagliabue's alma mater, and they went 19-11 in basketball. OHHHHH. KAYYYYYY.

Did I mention this guy is a real genius.

Thank God he doesn't have any input into the BCS rankings for college football because LSU would be playing Montana for the national championship this year.

[HounDoggy1]

I wonder if "Lee The Bootlicker" will be writing much about LSUA&M@BR's close association with the NCAA Rules & Infractions Committee?

Seems like this former Water Polo dud would have a lot to write about there.

Think about it.... a varsity letter in WATER POLO! That speaks volumes about his ability to pick 1-A football programs.

[turbodawg]

your handy-work, TurboDawg?

Man, oddly enough, I can't take credit for this one.

I can't believe the NewsStar didn't put it online.

Anybody, by any chance, have this article scanned that could email it? I'd like to read this clown's explanation.

[HounDoggy1]

[quote:e1b5c0b85b="Champ967"]your handy-work, TurboDawg?

Man, oddly enough, I can't take credit for this one.

I can't believe the NewsStar didn't put it online.

Anybody, by any chance, have this article scanned that could email it? I'd like to read this clown's explanation.[/quote:e1b5c0b85b]

They didn't put it online because they would have drawn extreme criticism from "legitimate" clowns who excell in making our children laugh.

The wanna-be clowns only make "us" laugh.

Hmmmmmm, I wonder why such an accomplished journalist from BR would be writing a long-distance column for the Monroe paper in the first place. Could it be that he is NOT so STELLAR and he's just whipping out his FINEBONG while sitting in front of a keyboard?

From looking at his website, he obviously needs the money. Not only is he a former WATER POLO dud, but he tapes high school athletes and makes them think he's gonna get them exposure for athletic scholarships, which IMHO is WORSE than conning seniors with guaranteed investment and home improvement scams.

[lightningbuginmonroe]

I'll dig it up this afternoon and post. It'll be after 1 p.m. before I am back, though.

[EJ]

Thanks. I know a lot of people have wanted to read it.

Be forewarned, it will probably bring a lot of responses to Feinswog. :wink:

[lightningbuginmonroe]

Here it is, guys ... enjoy!

---
Dear Lee (idiot),
The love letters of a sports columnist

BATON ROUGE - Let’s get one thing straight: Only my closest friends can call me an idiot.

But an LSU Bootlicker?

That’s funny.

And despite my protestations otherwise, a guy claiming he’s Jerry Falwall says he’ll pray for me.

No, it wasn’t a boring e-mail week on this end as we learned at least this much: Louisiana Tech fans don’t like it if someone suggests their football team should play in Division I-AA.

For the record, as I replied to my correspondents last week, I didn’t go to LSU. No, my degree is from Southern Illinois at Carbondale, a school with an enrollment of about 22,000.

Yet SIU proudly and properly plays in Division I-AA, where it averages a whopping 6,000 fans or so per home game and occasionally wins a football game.

LSU? I’ve lived in Baton Rouge almost 20 years.

Generally I like the players and coaches, so it’s nice when they win. Plus many of my friends and neighbors are diehard LSU fans and I hate to see them mope. You should have seen them through most of the 1990s.

None of that, however, has anything to do with whether or not I think Tech, Louisiana-Lafayette, Louisiana-Monroe and Tulane should play I-AA football. More on that later.

But it sure made for an interesting week.

For example:

“Hello idiot,

“Your precious LSU is having a lucky season. They are usually an average football team. Sure a few teams like Louisiana-Monroe and old USL are really stinking it up, but I’d like to see what LSU would have done against Penn State or Texas A&M. Louisiana Tech is a good football team that defeated Oklahoma State and played really well against Penn State for almost 3 quarters. LSU will bomb like they usually do and you can (he suggested an unusually difficult anatomical move) when Tech beats LSU next year in Baton Rouge.

“Sincerely yours,

“Doug Phillips”

Doug, as I told you, I think the world of Tech. I’ve been few places where I’ve been treated better. Some of the coaches in the athletic department are friends of mine. And I hope the Bulldogs have a great game in Baton Rouge next year.

“Lee,

“You must be quite fond of e-mails, for I can only imagine the torrent of which this one is going to be a part. Outside Baton Rouge (you know, out beyond the bridge) are proud schools that are a part of the University of Louisiana System. What may surprise you is that that is the only thing they have in common, academically and athletically. I speak on behalf of Louisiana Tech (it’s up north, between Monroe and Shreveport) that is due to play the Legislature’s school next September. I only hope your team relies on your logic and bases its expectations of the Bulldogs (that’s our mascot) on the play of those sad sorts from Lafayette. Thanks to your logic I am now dreaming of victory in Baton Rouge because Tech beat ULL 48-14 two years ago and 77-14 in 1998. That makes sense, right?”

Um, sure. Anyway, that was not signed, but David Cobb, your e-mail address gives you away.

“Jerry Falwell” never revealed his real name. But we went back and forth this week with what even he would agree was some hilarious stuff.

His opening salvo:

“the moral majority decided we should sit down and write you a really nice email about the success of louisiana tech football. honestly, we did. that’s what jesus would do.

“but, after further review, it seems that if that’s really the way you feel, and that is the limit of your knowledge of college sports, in trying to convince you otherwise in a single email, we would be practically attempting to completely relate the ineffable to your smooth-lobed, possibly reptilian-esque brain.

“more succintly said: you’re a mouth-breather. and god is not happy about your column.

“if you really think that louisiana tech belongs in 1aa, you’re hopless, clueless. please repent. check the records, read the sports pages more carefully. pray. a lot.

“i know a crack freelancer such as yourself has to write something to stir the pot, but give the majority a (expletive, which probably proved he wasn’t the real Jerry Falwell) break. tech is not a ul-x.

“god loves you and louisiana tech football, “jerry”

Jerry added a p.s. that said it was too bad LSU and Tech weren’t paired up in a first-round NIT meeting last spring. I agree.

•

More of your comments next week.

Lee Feinswog is a sports reporter in Baton Rouge. Reach him at 225-926-3256 or lee@sportsbatonrouge.com.
--------------------------------

[Tech77]

Actually, in his reply to me after I sent him the "bootlicker" e-mail, he ended by saying "But I did like the bootlicker line. "

So I think the idea appeals to him.

[HounDoggy1]

As a 20-year resident of Baton ROuge, he must have looked long and hard for a chance at his dream column in FUNROE!

As Jerry Byrd would say,
What aaaaaaa LaaLaa LaaaLoooooozer

[Tech77]

Hey, HD, that was a pretty good Jerry Byrd impression. :lol:

[HounDoggy1]

Hey, HD, that was a pretty good Jerry Byrd impression. :lol:

Thanks! :roll:

If you thought THAT was good, you should have seen the facial expression and body language that went with it. :lol:

[lightningbuginmonroe]

“Dear Idiot.”
“And Another Thing, LSU Bootlicker ...”

So begins another round of reader feedback on a recent column of mine in The News-Star — one that said Louisiana State University should be considered the state’s lone legitimate 1-A school.
"When you’re writing about how badly Tech has been outscored this season, if you had one ounce of journalistic credibility (which you don’t) you would have mentioned that included road games at Clemson, Penn State and Texas A&M. Let LSU play an out of conference schedule like that and see how they do."
Doesn’t make any difference. When things were bad during the 1990s for LSU, the Tigers still drew more than 60,000 per home game.

In an effort to bolster my aforementioned journalistic credibility, I offer the following research.
These are home attendance figures for 2001 from the NCAA: Louisiana Tech — 20,433; Louisiana-Monroe — 7,664; Tulane - 23,198; Louisiana-Lafayette — 9,456.
Those four schools average a total — a total — of 60,761 per game. And that’s for tickets sold. LSU, rather, averaged 90,491 last season.

And if you think it’s a slight to be in Division I-AA, where a Louisiana team other than LSU can actually contend for a national championship, consider that Grambling averaged 27,172 last year, Southern 19,370 and McNeese 14,280. The other two I-AA schools in Louisiana are Northwestern State (11,537) and Nicholls State (4,020).
Clearly, you don’t have to be in I-A to draw fans and play in the big time.

But back to the e-mails ...
"Mr. Feinswog,
"I read, with a great deal of amusement, your recent column about the Louisiana state schools. It always cracks me up when the lsu ‘hacks’ (and yes, I realize you guys all deny any soft feelings toward lsu) climb up on their high horse and declare where and how other state athletic programs ‘should’ be playing. And no, you’re not the first ...
"Tell you what, here’s a deal. We’ll worry about ourselves and where we need to be (and continue to be successful, I might add) and you Baton Rouge guys worry about keeping lsu on the straight and narrow. Given their propensity to cheating, it should be a full time job.
"Thanks,
"Ryan Bell"

There were quite a few "LSU cheats" comments. I think they all cheat. But that’s another issue for another time. Anyway, this one guy (hallmak was his e-mail, but he didn’t sign his name) decided he would go after me where it hurts.
"As the ultimate holier than thou LSU bootlicker, you know that the power of the pen is mighty; but SO is the power of the almighty DOLLAR."

Like, duh.

After a diatribe about LSU being a big cheater, he added:
"During my next trips to the Acadiana area, I will urge businesses having your machines in front of their establishments that I shall not do business with them until they remove those machines. Today, I have sent more than 800 letters to clients and friends in the Lafayette area to suggest likewise and suggest they discontinue ANY AND ALL business relationships with your paper and it’s advertisers as long as you are employed there."

Huh? I wrote this guy back and told him I had no idea what he was talking about. In his reply, he said,
"So far, I have been successful in getting four businesses HQ’d in Acadiana and doing business in Baton Rouge to either discontinue or curtail advertising with your paper. MORE TO FOLLOW! I’ll keep a list and then forward it to your publisher in 6 months — so he can calculate in LOST REVENUE, how much of a LIABILITY you are to his paper."

Then he went on another LSU cheats diatribe. This time I wrote back and explained that having businesses in Acadiana boycott The News-Star was all well and good but probably less than impactful. After all, I left Baton Rouge’s paper, The Advocate, more than four years ago to go out on my own and write columns that make people write e-mails.

"My sincerest apology for confusing your employment status.
"Because of your comments, I thought you were still employed by the Morning Upchuck. I was confused because you sounded like one of the official LSU A&M BR bootlickers.
"I give them credit for one thing. At least they very wisely don’t have you on their staff anymore.
"Now, back to the NCAA stuff. You can still write about that if you have the guts."

At least he didn’t call me an idiot.

Lee Feinswog is a News-Star sports reporter in Baton Rouge. Reach him at 225-926-3256 or lee@sportsbatonrouge.com.