scene at City Hall in San Francisco

[Cool Hand Clyde]

"Next."

"Good morning. We want to apply for a marriage license."

"Names?"

"Tim and Jim Jones."

"Jones? Are you related? I see a resemblance."

"Yes, we're brothers."

"Brothers? You can't get married."

"Why not? Aren't you giving marriage licenses to same gender couples?"

"Yes, thousands. But we haven't had any siblings. That's incest!"

"Incest?" No, we are not gay."

"Not gay? Then why do you want to get married?"

"For the financial benefits, of course. And we do love each other. Besides, we don't have any other prospects."

"But we're issuing marriage licenses to gay and lesbian couples who've been denied equal protection under the law. If you are not gay, you can get married to a woman."

"Wait a minute. A gay man has the same right to marry a woman as I have. But just because I'm straight doesn't mean I want to marry a woman. I want to marry Jim."

"And I want to marry Tim, Are you going to discriminate against us just because we are not gay?"

"All right, all right. I'll give you your license. Next."


"Hi. We are here to get married."

"Names?"

"John Smith, Jane James, Robert Green, and June Johnson."

"Who wants to marry whom?"

"We all want to marry each other."

"But there are four of you!"

"That's right. You see, we're all bisexual. I love Jane and Robert, Jane loves me and June, June loves Robert and Jane, and Robert loves June and me. All of us getting married together is the only way that we can
express our sexual preferences in a marital relationship."

"But we've only been granting licenses to gay and lesbian couples."

"So you're discriminating against bisexuals!"

"No, it's just that, well, the traditional idea of marriage is that it's just for couples."

"Since when are you standing on tradition?"

"Well, I mean, you have to draw the line somewhere."

"Who says? There's no logical reason to limit marriage to couples. The more the better. Besides, we demand our rights! The mayor says the constitution guarantees equal protection under the law. Give us a marriage license!"


"All right, all right. Next."

"Hello, I'd like a marriage license."

"In what names?"

"David Deets."

"And the other man?"

"That's all. I want to marry myself."

"Marry yourself? What do you mean?"

"Well, my psychiatrist says I have a dual personality, so I want to marry the two together. Maybe I can file a joint income-tax return."

"That does it! I quit!! You people are making a mockery of marriage!!"

[zharkins]

That was the best post I have seen in a long time...

P.S. Why can't he just marry his dog?

[TYLERTECHSAS]

"Next."

"Good morning. We want to apply for a marriage license."

"Names?"

"Tim and Jim Jones."

"Jones? Are you related? I see a resemblance."

"Yes, we're brothers."

"Brothers? You can't get married."

"Why not? Aren't you giving marriage licenses to same gender couples?"

"Yes, thousands. But we haven't had any siblings. That's incest!"

"Incest?" No, we are not gay."

"Not gay? Then why do you want to get married?"

"For the financial benefits, of course. And we do love each other. Besides, we don't have any other prospects."

"But we're issuing marriage licenses to gay and lesbian couples who've been denied equal protection under the law. If you are not gay, you can get married to a woman."

"Wait a minute. A gay man has the same right to marry a woman as I have. But just because I'm straight doesn't mean I want to marry a woman. I want to marry Jim."

"And I want to marry Tim, Are you going to discriminate against us just because we are not gay?"

"All right, all right. I'll give you your license. Next."


"Hi. We are here to get married."

"Names?"

"John Smith, Jane James, Robert Green, and June Johnson."

"Who wants to marry whom?"

"We all want to marry each other."

"But there are four of you!"

"That's right. You see, we're all bisexual. I love Jane and Robert, Jane loves me and June, June loves Robert and Jane, and Robert loves June and me. All of us getting married together is the only way that we can
express our sexual preferences in a marital relationship."

"But we've only been granting licenses to gay and lesbian couples."

"So you're discriminating against bisexuals!"

"No, it's just that, well, the traditional idea of marriage is that it's just for couples."

"Since when are you standing on tradition?"

"Well, I mean, you have to draw the line somewhere."

"Who says? There's no logical reason to limit marriage to couples. The more the better. Besides, we demand our rights! The mayor says the constitution guarantees equal protection under the law. Give us a marriage license!"


"All right, all right. Next."

"Hello, I'd like a marriage license."

"In what names?"

"David Deets."

"And the other man?"

"That's all. I want to marry myself."

"Marry yourself? What do you mean?"

"Well, my psychiatrist says I have a dual personality, so I want to marry the two together. Maybe I can file a joint income-tax return."

"That does it! I quit!! You people are making a mockery of marriage!!"

:P :P That is EXCELLENT!! But the sad part , which you are of course eluding to, is that these situations are coming next. :cry: Including Zharkins dog statement.

"Hi, I'd like a marriage license."

"In what names?"

"John Doe and Jane Smith"

"Ok, here you go."

Three months later, John's gotten drunk again, just like every night, and has beaten Jane. Jane, of course, doesnt tell anyone because she knows that "deep down inside, he's really a good man." So this goes on for a few more years, and they have kids, and the kids get abused by their drunken father, but it's all OK, because it's a perfectly traditional God-Approved marriage.

[TYLERTECHSAS]

I would bet that can, does and will happen in gay relationships/ "new marriages" as well. That was absurd. However FWIW, it seems interesting that you have brought up this scenario before.

[Memdawg]

"Hi, I'd like a marriage license."

"In what names?"

"John Doe and Jane Smith"

"Ok, here you go."

Three months later, John's gotten drunk again, just like every night, and has beaten Jane. Jane, of course, doesnt tell anyone because she knows that "deep down inside, he's really a good man." So this goes on for a few more years, and they have kids, and the kids get abused by their drunken father, but it's all OK, because it's a perfectly traditional God-Approved marriage.

He should have his sorry ass thrown in jail!!!! What the hell does that have to do with the institution of marriage??????????

[Bossdawg]

"Hi, I'd like a marriage license."

"In what names?"

"John Doe and Jane Smith"

"Ok, here you go."

Three months later, John's gotten drunk again, just like every night, and has beaten Jane. Jane, of course, doesnt tell anyone because she knows that "deep down inside, he's really a good man." So this goes on for a few more years, and they have kids, and the kids get abused by their drunken father, but it's all OK, because it's a perfectly traditional God-Approved marriage.

What the hell is your point. I don't beat my wife, my meighbor doesn't beat his, my dad doesn't beat my mom, my uncles don't beat their wifes. Yes every now and then their is a case of spousal abuse, but AIDS affects everyone in this country.

[quote:52f92f55c3="daybreaker"]"Hi, I'd like a marriage license."

"In what names?"

"John Doe and Jane Smith"

"Ok, here you go."

Three months later, John's gotten drunk again, just like every night, and has beaten Jane. Jane, of course, doesnt tell anyone because she knows that "deep down inside, he's really a good man." So this goes on for a few more years, and they have kids, and the kids get abused by their drunken father, but it's all OK, because it's a perfectly traditional God-Approved marriage.

What the hell is your point. I don't beat my wife, my meighbor doesn't beat his, my dad doesn't beat my mom, my uncles don't beat their wifes. Yes every now and then their is a case of spousal abuse, but AIDS affects everyone in this country.[/quote:52f92f55c3]Amen, Bossdawg.
Many believe that AIDS is God's punishment for the same-sex lifestyles that is so rampant in society today. Homosexuality is a "Choice", not a "condition that one is born with"; this choice is an abomination to God. See Genesis 18 and 19 for a biblical description of how God chose to handle this widespread lifestyle in Sodom and Gomorrah.

[zharkins]

You can't use the Bible in these arguments because the people you are debating mock God. It has to be a reason that stands on its own merit without using religion.

Why can't people walk around naked in public?
Why can't I park my car with no tires in my front yard?
Why can't I sell drugs?
Why can't a grown man wear a dress and high heels to the office?
Why can senior citizens eat the buffet for half the price I have to pay?
Why is there a sign at a McDonald's drive thru that tells me that a picture menu is available upon request? If I could read the sign, I wouldn't need the picture menu.
Why are there instructions in braille at drive up ATM's? Should blind people be driving?

There has to be a common answer to all of these questions.