Are you a Democrat, Republican, or Southern Republican?

[Dawgbert]

Are you a Democrat, Republican or Southern Republican?

What with elections coming up, we should all decide.

Question: How do you tell the difference between Democrats, Republicans and Southern Republicans? The answer can be found by posing the following question:

You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the knife, and charges. You are carrying a Glock .40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do?

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Democrat's Answer:

Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!

Does the man look poor or Oppressed?

Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?

Could we run away?

What does my wife think?

What about the kids?

Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?

What does the law say about this situation?

Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?

Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?

Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?

Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?

If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?

Should I call 9-1-1?

Why is this street so deserted?

We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.

This is all so confusing!

I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Republican's Answer:

BANG!

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Southern Republican's Answer:

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!

click....(sounds of reloading).

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!

click

Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips??"

[dawg80]

I don't know about party affiliation, but if someone was trying to hurt my wife and daughter, may God have mercy on him....because I won't.


(I do like the "nice grouping" remark though... )

[gbg001]

I don't know about party affiliation, but if someone was trying to hurt my wife and daughter, may God have mercy on him....because I won't.


(I do like the "nice grouping" remark though... )

The Republican would ask the man to sit down and have 6 party talks. The Republicans would actually shoot the next man that comes around that only "looks" like he has a gun.

[NTXDawg]

The Republican would ask the man to sit down and have 6 party talks. The Republicans would actually shoot the next man that comes around that only "looks" like he has a gun.

Yea another nice contradiction of Kerry's.

Complains that Bush acted "unilaterally" against Iraq and he should have built a better coalition. And then when Bush is trying to work with a coalition on the North Korean issue, Kerry wants to act unilaterally. Flip flop.

[CARTEK]

Can't be a true Southern Republican...10 shots...it's not a 1911!

[daybreaker2]

As an expert shot, you obviously shoot the guy in the kneecaps, incapacitating him, yet not killing him. The fact that you would openly admit to wanting to kill the man just shows what your true values are. Though, as Christians, I'm sure that's what you MEANT to say.

[CARTEK]

Incapacitate? No, I shoot to kill. Shoot to incapacitate and you may end up supporting the guy for the rest of his natural life especially if he hires a John Edwards look-a-like!

[daybreaker2]

And I dont doubt you would have no trouble at all reconciling killing a man with your conscience. And thats where we differ, and thats my whole point.

[DawgyNWindow]

And I dont doubt you would have no trouble at all reconciling killing a man with your conscience. And thats where we differ, and thats my whole point.

And how do you feel about killing fetuses?

[daybreaker2]

And how do you feel about killing fetuses?

I dont like that either.

However, stem cell research uses fetuses that are ALREADY dead. It's not a matter of either destroying or not destroying a fetus. These have ALREADY been destroyed. Why not get something useful out of them that could help millions of people? (this is the one thing I dont think Kerry pointed out clearly enough in Debate #2)

But yes, I am against the death penalty AND against abortion. Because of my faith.

[Bill Pup60]

I dont like that either.

However, stem cell research uses fetuses that are ALREADY dead. It's not a matter of either destroying or not destroying a fetus. These have ALREADY been destroyed. Why not get something useful out of them that could help millions of people? (this is the one thing I dont think Kerry pointed out clearly enough in Debate #2)

But yes, I am against the death penalty AND against abortion. Because of my faith.

FYI, that's exactly what is already happening and IS being funded by the federal government. On already EXISTING lines of embryonic stem cells. The existing lines will carry research for a long time. and just for an update.... there has so far been zero progress on finding any cures for anything from embryonic stem cells. All of the promising progress so far hs come from adult stem cells. This isn't to say that some breakthrough will not eventually come from embryonic stem cells, but so far it hasn't happened and it's not due to a lack of stem cells or any barrier to the research.

[DawgyNWindow]

FYI, that's exactly what is already happening and IS being funded by the federal government. On already EXISTING lines of embryonic stem cells. The existing lines will carry research for a long time. and just for an update.... there has so far been zero progress on finding any cures for anything from embryonic stem cells. All of the promising progress so far hs come from adult stem cells. This isn't to say that some breakthrough will not eventually come from embryonic stem cells, but so far it hasn't happened and it's not due to a lack of stem cells or any barrier to the research.

Not to mention that Bush was the FIRST president to fund embrionic stem cell research.

[NTXDawg]

Not to mention that Bush was the FIRST president to fund embrionic stem cell research.

Also don't forget that there is NO ban on privatly funded research of embryonic stem cells. All that Bush did was say "no taxpayer money" will go towards research on additional lines. Private research can continue on their merry way all they want to. So its really a red herring issue.

[TYLERTECHSAS]

Excellent points guys!

[daybreaker2]

Good points, yet completely bypassing the whole anti-christian bloodlust issue.