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http://www.youtube.com/watch_popup?v=-_cdbByTeNE The late great Richard Pryor as Obama 32 yrs.ago LMAO
Originally Posted by ddgravy
Heh, heh, heh......good one!!!
An airplane was about to crash; there were 5 passengers on board, but only 4 parachutes. The first passenger, Sarah Palin said,
"I have my own reality show and I am the smartest woman in American history, so America’s people don’t want me to die.”
She took the first pack and jumped out of the plane.
The second passenger, John McCain, said,
“I’m a Senator, and a decorated war hero from an elite...Navy unit from the United States of America ”.
So he grabbed the second pack and jumped..
The third passenger, Barack Obama said,
"I am the President of the United States and I am the smartest ever in the history of our country, some even call me the Anointed One."
So he grabbed the pack next to him and jumped out.
The fourth passenger, Billy Graham said to the fifth passenger, a 10-year-old schoolgirl,
“I have lived a full life, and served my God the best I could. I will sacrifice my life and let you have the last parachute.”
The little girl said,
“That’s okay Dr. Graham. There’s a parachute left for you. America’s smartest President took my schoolbag!
Supreme Court rules no Nativity scene in DC
The Supreme Court has ruled that there cannot be a Nativity Scene in the Unite States' Capital this Christmas season.
This isn't for any religious reason. They simply have not been able to find Three Wise Men in the Nation's Capitol.
A search for a Virgin continues.
There was no problem, however, finding enough asses to fill the stable
Hilarious!
Another Funny Rick Perry Bad Lipreading!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Md8jL_ZDOjQ
1. You refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to liquor.
You may be a Muslim
2. You own a $3,000 machine gun and $5,000 rocket launcher, but you can't afford shoes.
You may be a Muslim
3. You have more wives than teeth.
You may be a Muslim
4. You wipe your butt with your bare hand, but consider bacon unclean.
You may be a Muslim
5. You think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide.
You may be a Muslim
6. You can't think of anyone you haven't declared Jihad against.
You may be a Muslim
7. You consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives in your clothing.
You may be a Muslim
8. You were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs.
You may be a Muslim
9. You have nothing against women and think every man should own at least four.
You may be a Muslim
10. Your cousin is president of the United States .
You may be a Muslim
11. You find this offensive or racist and don't forward it.
You may be a Muslim
Just received this one. It's pretty funny and very sad at the same time.
The Arabs are not happy!
They're not happy in Gaza .
They're not happy in Egypt .
They're not happy in Libya .
They're not happy in Morocco .
They're not happy in Iran .
They're not happy in Iraq .
They're not happy in Yemen .
They're not happy in Afghanistan .
They're not happy in Pakistan .
They're not happy in Syria .
They're not happy in Lebanon .
They're not happy in Israel but want it.
So, where are they happy ?
They're happy in England .
They're happy in France .
They're happy in Italy .
They're happy in Germany .
They're happy in Norway .
They're happy in America.
They're happy in every country that is not Muslim.
And who do they blame?
Not Islam.
Not Mohammed
Not their leadership.
Not themselves.
THEY BLAME THE COUNTRIES
THEY ARE HAPPY IN and THE JUDEO CHRISTIAN RELIGIONS and CULTURES!
ARABS:
Everyone seems to be wondering why Muslim terrorists are so quick to commit suicide.
Let's have a look at the evidence: No Christmas. No television. No nude women. No football. No pork chops. No hotdogs. No burgers. No beer. No bacon. Rags for clothes. Towels for hats. Constant wailing from some idiot in a tower. More than one wife. More than one mother-in-law. You can't shave. Your wife can't shave. You can't wash off the smell of donkey. You wipe your ass with your hand. You cook over burning camel shit. Your wife is picked by someone else. Your wife smells worse than your donkey. Then they tell you that, "When you die, it all gets better". Well, no shit Sherlock! It's not like it could get much worse!
Could probably be the case all across the south.
Arab in Texas
An Arab enters a taxi cab in Dallas, Texas ..........
Once he is seated he asks the cab driver to turn off the radio, because he must not hear music as decreed by his religion and; in the time of the prophet, there was no music, especially Western music, which is music of the infidels and certainly no radio.
So the cab driver politely switches off the radio, pulls over to the side, stops the cab and opens the back door.
The Arab asks him: What are you doing man?
The Texan answers: In the time of the prophet there were no taxis.
So get your ass out and wait for a camel.
You gotta love Texas !
Three New Navy Ships
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=65HzSWKmVhw
http://www.rense.com/general88/threenew.htm
Looks like the Secret Service stuff might be made up to cover up some other indiscretions that happened in Columbia.
Looks like the Secret Service stuff might be made up to cover up some other indiscretions that happened in Columbia.
Looks like he just won her in an auction.
I just threw up.Looks like the Secret Service stuff might be made up to cover up some other indiscretions that happened in Columbia.
The Food Stamp Program, administered by the U.S. Department of Agriculture, is proud to be distributing the greatest amount of free meals and food stamps ever.
Meanwhile, the National Park Service, administered by the U.S. Department of the Interior, asks us to "Please Do Not Feed the Animals."
Their stated reason for the policy is because the animals will grow dependent on handouts and will not learn to take care of themselves.
This ends today's lesson.
"Seems the worst the economy gets, the lower gasoline prices are. Know what that means? Obama gets re-elected, gas could be free!" - Jay Leno
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